Saturday Night Fight! RED SOX BABIES V YANKEES BABIES!
Clayton Mortensen is MY KING O HEAVENLY FATHER WE SING YOUR PRAISES AH-MEN!Just kidding, I believe in evolution.Pawtucket won 5-4 in ten innings, Clayton Mortensen pitched seven scoreless innings and...
View ArticleUm, yeah, no shit David Pauley was on drugs.
Although I'm sure it came as a surprise to people who have never seen someone on drugs before.A few years ago, I was watching a Red Sox post-game interview with the starting pitcher. (Have I talked...
View Article8.26.13 Pawtucket Red Sox v SWB RailRiders - Fukú v Zafa
Pawtucket wins 2-1, when Scranton held a 1-0 lead until the ninth inning and all signs pointed to a win for them. Allen Webster pitched great but Jose De La Torre got the win. The game was so well...
View Article8.27.13 Scranton Wilkes-Barre @ Pawtucket - Zinger
Scranton Wilkes-Barre wins, 2-1, so another tight little game. Win goes to Graham Stoneburner. I'll bet these teams are really sick of each other. Poor Drew Sutton, having to make awkward small talk...
View Article8.28.13 Pawtucket Red Sox v Syracuse Chiefs - She Scratches His Beard
Pawtucket defeats Syracuse, 5-4, thanks to Drew Sutton and no thanks to Pedro Beato. Win goes to De La reliever, save goes to IL All-Star Anthony Carter.Starting pitcher was Charlie Haeger, who god...
View ArticleThey Saved Ryan Lavarnway's Brain (Didn't They?)
This is real live stuff from someone purporting to be Lavarnway, who last I heard attended a prestigious New England school. And maybe had a lobotomy."Never give up! Never surrender! That was...
View Article8.29.13 Pawtucket v Syracuse - Jackie Bradley Jr Takes It Like a Man
Pawtucket wins, improbably, 2-0. Zany. Freshie Matt Barnes gets the win in his Triple-A debut, so thanks for this, Meat.Barnes pitched 5 1/3 innings, was replaced in the middle of the sixth so lefty...
View Article8.31.13 Pawtucket v Syracuse - It's just a shame that's all.
The Syracuse Chiefs take it, 2-1. Sorry, Syracuties, you missed it by 12.5 games. It's all Cole Kimball's fault.Starter for Pawtucket was Allen Webster, who threw 67 pitches and split. That has nothing...
View Article9.1.13 Pawtucket Red Sox @ Lehigh Valley IronPigs - Alex Hassan Will Never Die
Pawtucket wins, 5-0, in a game that got rained all over so they only played six innings. Or five and a half. The IronPigs essentially said, you know what, it's shitty rain out and who cares and we're...
View Article9.2.2013 Ending of everything, the ending is everything.
PawSox win, 4-0 over the Lehigh Valley IronPigs over there in Allentown, where there's corn and airports and affordable housing and the star of Bethlehem and lager. And Lager. This country was promised...
View Article9.4.13 Post-season's Greetings From Rochester!
New York is beautiful this time of year! Pawtucket got crushed, 7-1, mostly thanks to Ranaudo having an off night. He only pitched two innings on account of sucking. In fact, after the game he found a...
View Article9.5.2013 Pawtucket defeats Rochester, 7-2.
And the Durham Bulls are 2-0. Feisty, feisty Rochester is not going to lie down for the Pawtuckets, nohow.Starting P for the Red Sox was Clay Buchholz, who pitched like one inning and then hit the...
View Article9.6.2013 Pawtucket Red Sox v Rochester Red Wings - Maximum Big Surprise
Red Sox defeat Red Wings in Pawtucket, 5-1. Steven Wright gets the win for the RI Sox.Wright pitched 6 1/3 innings. The Red Wings got six hits off Wright, but could not translate them into runs. Wright...
View ArticlePlayoff bound, playoff gagged.
I went to the game on Saturday night, even though I had a couple of other much more fun things I wanted to do. In many ways, Pawtucket did me a favor by losing that night because I got to attend a...
View Article9.10.2013 Pawtucket Red Sox v Durham Bulls - Brock Holt's Perceived Value
Pawtucket wins a squeaker, 2-1, in what was truly a defensive game. Good thing we've got Holt. It was pretty exciting, wish I could have been there.Starter for the PawSox was Anthony Ranaudo. Ranaudo...
View Article9.11.2013 This is the fucking playoffs.
Durham wins 2-1, which is good not bad because this is super cereal. Did you know that I do not know how to type?Starter for Pawtucket Red Sox was Steven Wright, and damn it, Wright did a fantastic...
View ArticleAs a woman I was taught to always be hungry.
Could not help but notice last night that the Pawtucket press box was a total bro-fest.Well, that's not exactly what I mean. "Bro-fest" does not express a complete absence of ladies.I should have said...
View Article9.13.13 If you're gonna sleep like that, then you might as well be dead. BRYCE.
I don't know if I can ever forgive Bryce Brentz for his shit performance last night. And because I'm feeling kinda dirty, feeling kind of mean, here's a picture of a MILF. Hey, isn't that Bryce Brentz'...
View ArticleMaria Delgado wanted to spend more time with her kids, anyway.
Finally over.I don't have any strong feelings about that last game. Could be because I was essentially sucking beer out of the McCoy Stadium taps by the third inning. Charlie Haeger is not a strong...
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